9/11

9/11 is such an important date for me on so many levels.

Well I can’t believe it has been one year. It has probably been of the hardest year of my life. 9/11 brings so many emotions for me and especially this entire week. I re-lived John receiving the call about my dad having a stroke and him just wrapping his arms around me when he hung up. I knew it was not good. I re-lived seeing my dad in the hospital. I re-lived saying goodbye. Going through all of this has been an emotional roller coaster this week, but I am eternally grateful for my testimony of the plan of salvation. I know I will see him again and will get that last hug that I never got. I know he is still up there looking out for me and as I have been told in blessings I now have two Fathers in Heaven looking out for me. There is a song I have found called “You Can Let Go” and it reminds me of this past year so much. I have the strength now that I feel like I can tell my Dad that he can let go and I will be okay. It still is hard and it hurts at times, but he needs to carry on with the work that he needs to do there. I still miss him immensely and probably always will.

9/11 brings back the surreal feeling of watching the twin towers and the pentagon. I will never forget the way that changed my life. I realized in that moment that if something was to happen closer to home, John could be called away. My heart will forever go out to the families that lost loved ones that day.

9/11 does have a shining star of meaning that I cling to. Nineteen years ago John asked me to marry him. September 11, 1989. I am grateful for him and that I can glean a bit of happiness from a day that has so much other meaning to it. He has brought so much into my life and I love him for it. Thanks John. I Love You!

I know it is not just me that this day affects. Kaitlyn had been talking to the seminary teachers how this one-day has so much meaning to our family. Mikenna is so affected by it that when she did a memorial project for school this past week, it was called “Kenna’s Remembrance Park”. It was dedicated to all who have lost their lives on 9/11. There is a playground etc. with a bench dedicated to Dewey Foutz. She has remembered the date all on her own. A few weeks ago she asked if we were going to Farmington on the 11th. The last sentence of her paragraph she had to write says I miss my grandpa. This pretty much sums up the past year.